Fear of Success is an emotional roller coaster and this song is the steep drop. I’ve placed it very strategically in the track order. Every line in the second and third verses rhyme. I know some artists like to do that as a challenge, but doing so with this song just came naturally. Beyond the technical aspects, the creation of “Perfect for Me” has a backstory unlike any of my other songs.
I am my harshest critic, always looking back on my music and hearing the flaws. I have never once done that with “Perfect for Me.” This is my favorite song I’ve ever written. In fact, I haven’t touched the lyrics since April 13, 2012 – the day the relationship in the song went down in flames.
Believe it or not, “Perfect for Me” actually started as a love song. The thing about love songs, though, is they are all too often lacking soul. So I stopped writing with my stupid, idealistic heart and started being honest. It just so happened that I would finish it only hours before emotions got so heavy I’d be unable to write anything of significance for months.
Some time later, when I finally began working on the album again I went back to those lyrics and they read very differently to me. I noticed each verse becoming more delusional. By the end I wondered if I was trying to convince her she’s perfect for me, or if I was trying to convince myself of that.
I didn’t see it when I first wrote it, so you might not have noticed when you first heard it. That’s why I wanted to do a video for this song. I wanted to give everyone a chance to experience the song in context – even if it was via a budget-ass video.
Oh yeah, I should probably talk about the actual video since that’s what this post is about. Cinematography was done by Andrea Malatesta who had to work with much less space and much more choreography than she did for “Battle Rap.” Watching footage of myself trying to direct her between scenes and outtakes makes me look and feel like a shitty person. Okay, shittier person.
The first two minutes of the video were shot with no edits. Since we went the route of first-person perspective, I felt an extended scene with no breaks would trap the audience in the situation. Once the scene splits, so do the characters. At least that’s how I envisioned it. If you just notice poor editing and bad lighting that’s fine too. I didn’t go to film school so maybe my thought process behind the whole thing is backwards and wrong.
Anyway, just watch it. If you like it, consider saying something nice about it. If not, eat something tasty and take your mind off of it.
