In 2003, Rootbeer and Inspecta Spark (then known as Mr. Rotten Treats) had planned out an EP called Murder Treats. Time and distance separated the two, but over a decade later they ran into each other at a concert. After recording the song “Axis of Axes” (also featuring The Rawhide Kid), Rootbeer and Inspecta Spark decided to pick up where they had left off 18 years prior and finally create Murder Treats.
Archives for : Rootbeer
Releasing a new song every week was my way of building up to a grand finale: and by that I mean my birthday. I turn 31 today, and In/Stability: The Ultimate Ending is Rootbeer’s birthday gift to Adam Wells. Your gift to me can be listening to the album on the platform of your choice.
Spotify
YouTube
Bandcamp
The last song, “Home 2 U,” which is the only song that had not been released prior to today, also has a lyric video I made myself using a GoPro that was taped to five dog food cans stacked on one another.
I’m not kidding.
Also, if you haven’t checked it out yet, Emcee Graffiti and I wrangled a bunch of local 518 artists and dropped a remix for “These Things Happen” on Friday so go check that out too!
Finally, I’ve written up a long, heartfelt post about the album, with some extra focus on “Home 2 U.” If you hate reading, there is a near-verbatim recitation of it in Rootbeer & Rawhide Rate Rappers Episode 19, which has just been uploaded to Soundcloud. You can listen to that below, or scroll just slightly further down to read the commentary.
If you’ve been listening to the song releases every Friday, you’ll be familiar with the album by now, except for the last song, which this post is going to explain. First, let’s go way, way back to when I first started rapping. The most common question I was asked by my family and friends was: “why?” Why did I want to make music?
The answer I always gave was: “to have my message heard.” Truth be told, I wasn’t entirely sure what that message was for a very long time. I was figuring it out as I went along, and figuring myself out too. Hip-hop was therapy for me. I think back to songs like “Twisted Thoughts,” “Alone,” “Suicide Note,” “Esperanza,” “How Ya Feelin?,” “Loose Ends” and “Alone with Myself” and find that they detail the struggle of someone who hasn’t fully come to terms with his depression.
I suppose, then, that depression fueled me since before I was even conscious of it. Now think back through the songs on In/Stability. Name one instance where I mention depression. You can’t. Sure, there’s some self-deprecation, plenty of awareness of personal flaws, but even at the points of deepest scrutiny, there is always perseverance.
Every song on this album represents an element of my life falling apart:
- Place Beyond the Pines: environment
- These Things Happen: the music industry
- I Suck: self-esteem
- Old You Back: interpersonal relationships
- Girl of my Dreams: sense of reality
- Let Love Die: love
- I Can’t Tell: hip-hop
- S.W.A.T. II: society
- Dat Atdo: judgment
“Home 2 U” breaks the trend. 2013 was the worst year of my life. I had lost my will to live, but the small shred of sanity left within me – the “voice in the back of my head” if you will – challenged me to work on myself. This song is about that voice, the one and only indication that I was “in stability.” Suddenly that slash in the title makes sense. The song, and the album by proxy, are about being okay despite losing so much because I never lost my sense of self.
Thankfully, my struggles were not coupled with substance abuse. However, I recognized that mental health is a primary cause of alcoholism, so I thought back to when my mother stopped drinking. She was tasked with writing a list of things she liked about herself. I could not remember how many things were on the list, but I figured it was somewhere between 25 and 50, so I challenged myself to make a list of 40. The first 20 were surprisingly easy and I wrote them all down in one sitting. The next ten came slower, over the course of weeks. The final ten, and especially the final five, took months of personal reflection.
When I finished the list, I decided to turn it into a song. “Home 2 U” is that song.
Not only is “Home 2 U” a result of my mental health progress and the story that In/Stability has told over this three-month rollout, it’s the conclusion I had been unable to reach since I wrote my first rhymes on a hotel notepad in 1999 – twenty long and eventful years ago. Those songs I mentioned earlier, where I hadn’t yet come to terms with my depression…they are the first act.
Fear of Success, my most depressing album, particularly the songs “Lost in my Depression” (obviously), “Ghost of my Past,” “Perfect for Me” and “PTSD” details the struggle of someone who recognizes the depression but for whom it has become too heavy. That is the second act. Well, if you want to get technical I’d say being not-depressed for a while in college was like the second act and then Fear of Success was more of a climactic third act.
In/Stability: The Ultimate Ending, and the subtitle is important, is the final act. Making this album wasn’t therapy for me like the others were, it was a way to share the revelation of what really mattered. Once spoken, hip-hop was no longer needed as a vessel for the message, and I could move on. Therefore, I chose to make the song and the album end with the music cutting in and out, like a radio station losing its frequency the further you drive away from it.
As you may be able to guess by my use of the terms “final act” and “move on,” this is my final solo album.
I felt so good about this decision…and yet as I sit here typing this post my face is getting tighter and my fingers don’t want to touch the keys. Please don’t mistake this for retirement. I am committed to making Whiteout! 3. Any time Rawhide needs a guest verse from me, I will do it and I’ll be really excited about it. If Emcee Graffiti tells me he needs an opener for a show he’s booking, I’ll be there on stage. If, down the line, a whole song comes to mind and it’s not meant to be a collaboration, I’ll record it, but I’ll put it out right away.
I feel, at present, freer than I have felt in quite some time. Fear of Success and In/Stability were in the works, concurrently, since 2012. Even since 2002, there hasn’t been a period of more than a few months where I wasn’t working on an album.
If you’ve known me personally, you may have seen me walking with my head down, oblivious to your presence even if you call out to me. That’s because I’ve always had a beat in my head. Literally, I feel like I’ve lived “to the beat of my own drum.” With that ever-changing beat in my head I was always constructing songs, verses, hooks. But the music stopped a while ago and I don’t miss it. I feel so very content with the body of work I’ve developed over the past 20 years and the personal struggles it has allowed me to overcome. It will always be here to provide support for anyone who is going through the same mental health journey. For me, though, I’ve gone from “Twisted Thoughts” to thoughts of starting a family. So thank you, hip-hop, for bringing me “Home 2 U.” To Adam, that is.
And thank every last one of you who has read this post. I hope you enjoyed the album, though I didn’t really make it for you.
Have you seen the video for “These Things Happen?”
Just what was that little scene on Graffiti’s porch at the end?
It was a teaser for the REMIX! Graffiti and I gathered some of the Capital District’s finest spitters to give you five minutes and forty-one seconds of nonstop lyrical onslaught.
Stream “These Things Happen (518 Remix)”
Spotify
YouTube
Shout out to Jake Strain, JB!!, Emcee Graffiti, Xkwisit and Dephyant for being a part of this. Shout out also to Knowle’ge who wanted to be on the song but couldn’t get his schedule to align.
Like all of the songs on In/Stability: The Ultimate Ending – which releases on 1/19 (that’s less than 48 hours from now), the “These Things Happen (518 Remix)” was mixed and mastered by Scoops. The art that accompanies the YouTube audio was put together by Andrea Malatesta.
Chances are, if you clicked on this post you’re trying to figure out what “Dat Atdo” means. The title is just “That Ass, Though” slurred. Now that you have your answer, I hope you stay and read the rest of this post. Either way, thank you for listening to the song.
Stream “Dat Atdo”
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This song was originally intended for Whiteout! 2. The beat was in the original pack of instrumentals Rawhide sent me for that album and I had written what ended up becoming the second verse and half of the third verse for “Dat Atdo.” At that time, however, the working title was “Unhealthy Life Choices.” Whiteout! 2 became halted after I wrote my parts for five tracks so both Rawhide and I could finish up solo projects. The problem is, I continued to make said unhealthy life choices and gave myself enough fuel to complete the song on my own. I remember telling Rawhide that I was jacking the instrumental for selfish reasons but he was totally cool with it. Always is, actually. He just loves that his work gets used. He also loves it when I throw him around, sit on his stomach and hold him down.
What was I talking about? Oh yeah.
So the song is all about making bad decisions and, thus, the element of my life falling apart here is judgment.
I remember having all three verses written and being uncertain about what to do for the chorus. I remember writing the chorus some time later while I was picking Andrea up from work, waiting in the car. What I don’t remember is when or why I decided that slurring “that ass, though” would give the song more personality. I mean, it definitely does and it was definitely my idea. I even tried a few different spellings before settling on “Dat Atdo,” and, honestly, the only reason I went with that spelling is because…
Callbacks to Alternate Ending
While the two songs are nothing alike conceptually, the title is a callback to “Dat Duzit” off Alternate Ending.
Rawhide Report
So this is a pretty deep track. I can hear the self-loathing dripping off of every verse you deliver in this song; it’s very intense. And since I’ve been privy to the real-life events you’re rapping about, I know that that self-loathing was real and not just some act or a character you were putting on just for the sake of the song. From a lyrical standpoint these are my favorite verses on the album. Your verses have that confessional intensity to them like “Cold Turkey” does, but as a listener I also feel like maybe I’m really not supposed to be hearing about what you’re talking about; which I think is accentuated by your delivery for this track. At times it almost feels like I’m eavesdropping on a conversation you’re having with yourself, and I feel a bit guilty about what I’m hearing. Way to really create a hell of an atmosphere.
Now let’s talk about that end part. Firstly I’ve been listening to the demo version of this song for quite a while now and I’m not in that version, so now try to picture me jumping in the seat of my car while driving because I just had the shit scared out of me hearing my own voice coming through my speakers and I wasn’t ready for it haha. I don’t ever remember recording that, when did we do that? Anywho, not only does this end part feel like the climax of the song but I feel like it also serves as the climax of the whole album. I really like how you deliver your acapella verse to the sound of cars rushing by in the background, I think it serves as a nice allegory to the life you could have had passing you by. A very wise man once told me something along the lines of “if that was intentional then good call, and if it wasn’t intentional pretend like it was,” so I would like to impart that guidance back onto you. One final comment I want to make is that, in listening to this song, the end part especially, I get a little uneasy. I know the ending acapella signifies your self-realization and is basically supposed to be the start of your redemption but when I listen I just get kind of a slightly sinister vibe bubbling right below the surface.
Stream “S.W.A.T. II”
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If any song I’ve ever written will cost me fans, it’ll be this one. While every song on the album represents an element of my life falling apart, this one is a bit broader. It represents the collapse of society.
This is going to be the most difficult Rootbeer Report to write, except maybe for the last song on the album but we’ll see once I get there. The reason this one is so tricky is because the lyrics themselves were written with precision in mind and I wanted every line to be taken at face value. Any “analysis” that I could do would simply be turning poem to prose so if you clicked on this post looking for justification for anything I say in this song, you’re not going to find it here.
I will, however, discuss the impetus and consult both the timestamps on my files and Wikipedia when I misremember specific dates and details.
Let’s Get Political!
If you count all of the projects I’ve mixed myself, I’ve released 6 solo albums (In/Stability is the 7th), 3 collaboration albums, 3 EPs and 1 mixtape. The only songs that exist partially in the realm of political rap are “S.W.A.T.” on Alternate Ending (there’s your callback) and “They Need Us” on Whiteout! 2. I’ve avoided making political rap because all too often it comes across as corny, especially from white rappers. I made that decision a long time ago after becoming an Immortal Technique fan. I learned a lot about history from Tech’s music, and I also learned how little I truly understand about the world. For me to tackle political topics based on gut feeling would be irresponsible.
That doesn’t mean, however, that I am out-of-touch. A very specific series of events inspired me to write the first verse of this song:
- On July 5, 2016, Alton Sterling was shot and killed on camera by two Baton Rouge Police officers.
- A DAY LATER Philando Castile was murdered by a police officer on camera in Minnesota
- ANOTHER DAY LATER, a terrorist opened fire on police officers at a Black Lives Matter protest, which the news quickly spun to a false narrative undermining Black Lives Matter.
After this hellish series of events, I was enraged and wrote a verse, which ended up becoming the first verse of “S.W.A.T. II.” On July 12, 2016 I recorded that verse over Cypress Hill’s “Cock the Hammer” beat and sent it to a few people looking for honest feedback, namely: “does this come across as corny or disingenuous in any way?”
To my surprise, the response was overwhelmingly positive.
Still, I felt like I shouldn’t release the track, not because I didn’t stand by the lyrics or because I feared a negative response, but because a 16 bar freestyle over a then-23-year-old beat (albeit one of my favorite instrumentals of all time) detached from any sort of project was unlikely to make any sort of impact. If I’m going to use my platform of privilege to speak on issues, I don’t want it falling on deaf ears.
So I sat with the song for a while and that’s when my memory gets a little hazy. Chris Prythm posted a beat called “Crush,” and I thought I got it specifically for this song. However, the file was saved to my computer on December 21, 2015 – seven months BEFORE that first verse was written. What likely happened was I grabbed the beat because I liked it but didn’t have a plan for it, then rediscovered it in my files later on and found that it had the right energy to compliment the lyrics. So I suppose my foresight is stronger than my creativity.
Once I decided the “Crush” beat would become “S.W.A.T. II,” I got to work on some other verses. The first covered police brutality, so I chose two other topics for which I have strong opinions: racism and religion. With that, I’ll let the song speak for itself.
Rawhide Report
“Jesus Christ, another song that is in the running for my favorite of the album and another hard ass song. I’d certainly say that this is a worthy successor to the original, in fact it’s my favorite of the two. I hope when people listen to this song they really listen to the lyrics and give themselves some time to digest what you’re saying and what you’re trying to accomplish with this song because I think this is one of the most important songs in your discography. This song works because it’ll make people think and make them question their beliefs and belief systems when they might not normally do so.”
Stream “I Can’t Tell”
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Role in the Album Concept
Every song on the album represents an element of my life falling apart. “I Can’t Tell” represents hip-hop, and I don’t mean that in the sense of music quality but rather the intent of its creators. It’s become increasingly difficult to determine everyone’s motives. To a degree, it seemed as though everyone wanted to impact the genre to some degree, but now it seems like many artists are content with fifteen minutes of fame as long as the paycheck is substantial enough. The goal of this song was not to hate on the newer generation but to question, in a sarcastic tone, if enough is being done to advance the culture.
Writing: Thank Cudi
This was actually the first song I started writing for In/Stability and it dates back as far as 2013! I discussed this on Episode 17 of Rootbeer & Rawhide Rate Rappers, by the way, without giving the song’s name. It was this one.
Basically, I was traveling upstate to Potsdam where Rawhide and I were doing a show together. On those trips I always burned several CDs (no AUX port or USB in my old car) to check out new music while driving. On this particular adventure I was listening to Kid Cudi’s Indicud for the first time. The intro, “The Resurrection of Scott Mescudi,” seemed to open some floodgate in my mind because I just started thinking of lines. I dug through my center console for any piece of paper I could find, which ended up being some car insurance paperwork. I drove with one hand on the wheel, trying to press the piece of paper in the center so I could write down everything that came to mind.
As the song transitioned into “Unfuckwittable” and then “Just What I Am,” I found myself pausing the music repeatedly to jot down more lyrics.
There was one problem with these lyrics, however. They did not feel like family with the other songs I had been writing. See, by this point Fear of Success was mostly written. I considered splitting the album into two parts and calling the project Short Shifts, Long Lunches, but that Lunches disc started becoming more of a junk drawer. So some of the songs moved back to Fear of Success, others showed up on Rootbeer Ruins Everything and the rest just never got finished. But “I Can’t Tell” was a song I had bigger plans for. Some time later, Chris Prythm published a beat in June 2014 called “Never Break” which I immediately knew would fit with the song I had written that day.
Recording: Thank Rawhide
I tried recording the song more times than I can count over the course of about 5 years. On three separate occasions I was satisfied with what I had put together, but when I went back to listen later on I changed my mind. As a result, “I Can’t Tell” was actually the second-to-last song I recorded the final vocals for on In/Stability, despite it being the first song written by a considerable amount of time.
Still, even with vocals I was happy with, the beat still felt like it overpowered me at times. One day while Rawhide was visiting I played the song for him in the car, giving him a stripped-down explanation of what I thought the problem was, but not going into too much detail so he could form his own opinion. At this time, the synths that kick in during the last bar of each verse were actually going all through the song except for the first half of the second verse. Rawhide suggested taking that part of the second verse and looping it for all of the verses. That ended up saving the song. He addresses that in his review below.
Rawhide Report
Oh man, I know I’ve heard this song before now, when I was last at your place. Now that I have an actual copy of it to listen to whenever I want, I gotta say that this shit slaps. Just like with “These Things Happen.” The beat, lyrics, delivery, and attitude all come together to produce something that gets me hype. I’m glad you decided to redo the structure of the verses in the beat after we talked about it, the song just flows so perfectly. This song is in some pretty stiff competition with “These Things Happen” as my favorite of the album so far. The acapella at the end of this track might be my favorite acapella verse of yours on the album. Not only does it set up [REDACTED] perfectly, but the religious indignation that you portray gets my atheist blood pumping.
Stream “Let Love Die”
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Callbacks to Alternate Ending
“The Best Nightmare” always got great feedback from people, whether they heard the studio version or if they saw me perform it live.
It’s one of my favorite songs too because it has so many conflicting emotions. For that reason I made a sequel to it in 2010 called “Recurring Nightmare” which I’m also very proud of.
I never intended to make a trilogy, but it felt like a disservice to ignore the best Alternate Ending track for a sequel album.
In a production sense, this song is actually a continuation of TWO Alternate Ending tracks. I “produced” the beat with the same program I used to make the first two “Nightmare” songs. I chose a guitar riff that sounded like those songs, but I also used ambient noises that were similar to the ones used in “Smart Girls” (also off Alternate Ending) and, more obviously, the same “ooo” and “yeah” female vocals as that song (though I flipped the order).
Origins & Role in the Album Concept
This song actually started out as two songs: “Let Love Die” and “The Basics of Love” and neither was intended to be a continuation of the “Nightmare” saga. A main theme of those “Nightmare” songs is fearing the end of one relationship in pursuit of another. In retrospect, I believe that each of my relationships prepared me for the next in some way, such as not jumping in too deep, or not blaming myself when I’m not be the priority. Likewise, these relationships made me a better person, such as teaching me greater self-sufficiency on both professional and emotional levels. I’ve made a number of songs about the hurt, which is often the emotion that overpowers the others. For a change, I wanted to celebrate the positives of being in three “failed” relationships, writing one verse about each of them. No surprise here: the element of my life falling apart in this song is love.
Rawhide Report
First off I have to acknowledge the obvious connections to “The Best Nightmare” and “Recurring Nightmare” both lyrically and in terms of the production. This was one of the first songs for this project that you sent me, so I’ve been listening to this one for quite a while; so long in fact that I always forget that you haven’t even released it yet. I’m not sure if this is one of the other songs you’re going to give the “single” treatment to but I feel like it could definitely be a strong contender. Much like its aforementioned sister wives, I think “Let Love Die” is a relatable and accessible song. A lot of people are going to be able to identify with content of this song. I can also tell that you put a lot of time and care into constructing this song to make sure that it tied into the other two thematically.
Stream “Girl of My Dreams”
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Background and Role in the Album Concept
This song was legitimately written about a dream I had. I woke up with this odd feeling similar to longing and reminiscence; but you can’t long for someone who never existed and you can’t reminisce about a memory that never happened. It was that feeling I tried to capture in this song, which fit perfectly with the In/Stability theme of the elements of my life falling apart. This song represents the loss of my sense of reality.
Writing Process
As I said, I wanted to capture the feeling from the dream in the song. I went through the instrumentals on my computer, just to find something to write to. Coincidentally, I had one from Rawhide called “just a dream” so I started there.
I began by describing the girl:
“hair light brown, eyes striking blue”
Then the scenario:
“We shared a dorm room for some reason
Pushed the beds together even though it wasn’t a cold season”
And finally how I felt when the dream was over:
“When I woke without her, wanted to burst at the seams
Screaming, urgently recurring the themes”
The rest of the song teeters on the brink between dream and reality, debating if there is any way to fully escape the latter. After recording two verses and a hook, I knew the “just a dream” instrumental was a keeper, and it also made me think of another artist who had an entire album dedicated to dreams.
Finding the Right Guest
I reached out to the artist who made the “dream” album but they were touring and unable to get me a verse. Switching gears to Uprooted for a few months, the song remained in an unfinished state with no third verse. Then I saw Uprgrade was going to be doing a show in Albany. Thought I’d swing through and check on the homie. Upgrade was opening for an artist named Kosha Dillz, who was also touring with an artist by the name of Devmo.
When I first saw Devmo in the venue, I’ll admit I thought she was one of the rappers’ girlfriends. Even when she took the stage I thought she was just helping with soundcheck. Then she went into her first song and I was blown away. Her lyrics were extremely self-aware, her style was contemporary but also very original and it was delivered in this hypnotic voice that felt like it existed in that exact dimension between dream and reality. It was the voice I needed on my song.
After her set I bought her EP and we exchanged information. Soon after I emailed her the concept for “Girl of my Dreams” and she was super into it. I sent her what I had, including a freshly-altered version of the chorus that I worked her name into. When she sent me back her verse, I was sold by the second line: “Like the birds and the bees, one of them going extinct.” Fucking. Genius.
Rawhide Report
I know we talked at length about this track before, but for the purpose of this review I would be remiss if I didn’t shine a nice big spotlight on your guest on this song. Devmo absolutely kills it; her voice is just so unique and when she starts singing in that one little part I always get so happy and I’m always left wanting to hear more of that from her. I guess your verses are pretty dope too haha. I will blow a lot of smoke up your ass and give you a nice big shaft lick when I say that it was absolutely genius on your part to select her to be on this song. Having a female presence on the song really brings it to a whole new dimension and gives the content a completely different perspective that just would not have been there if it was just you or you had a male guest. Also the mixing job on this track in particular is phenomenal.
Stream “Old You Back”
Role in the Album Concept
Listening back through Alternate Ending, “Before I’m Torn Apart” is one of those songs that exists mid-narrative. The people I wrote about in that song are ones I wanted to make amends with. Over ten years have passed since that song was released and my take on interpersonal relationships has changed. As you get older, the people you were once very close to will drift apart. I often make efforts to keep in touch with these people and many do the same with me. However, there are others who won’t go so far as to reply to a text message.
The strength of a bond does not rest on the shoulders of only one person. Therefore, I will no longer invest my time and energy into people who won’t give me even the slightest amount of theirs. Maybe that point of view is maturity, maybe I’m just fed up, or maybe – generally speaking – the former is a product of the latter. For the album concept, elements of my life falling apart, “Old You Back” represents interpersonal relationships.
The Elephant in the Room
With “Old You Back” I wrote three verses, one each for a person who I feel has let me down. One is an former friend, another is a failed relationship. However, the one that is certain to get the most attention here is the person I address in the second verse: Eminem. The Slim Shady LP is the album that made me want to rap. It forever changed my life. To this day I consider The Eminem Show one of the greatest works of lyricism in hip-hop history. Most would argue his subsequent projects were less impactful.
While I was not as moved by Relapse or Recovery, I still consider them well above average. I frequently defended Eminem in rap discussions. For example, disgruntled fans have used the “Italian sausage” line in the third verse of “Legacy” to argue that he has no content. Aside from that line, however, the song is incredible! To say he lacks content because you choose to overlook it is not critical analysis, it’s hating, plain and simple.
Then Shady XV was released…
While the project does boast some solid tracks like “Guts Over Fear” and “Detroit vs. Everybody” (with arguably Big Sean’s greatest verse ever), others were completely indefensible. “Right for Me” is perhaps the living embodiment of everything the disgruntled fans had been saying about him. I dare anyone to explain to me what the song is actually about. Not only is it nonsensical, but he uses an awkward, offbeat flow and delivers his verses with aimless anger. I felt let down; not that I was owed anything. It was just odd watching him morph into the exact definition of what he had been accused.
Still, I kept this disappointment to myself. That is, until Joe Budden released “Slaughtermouse.” If you haven’t heard that song, Joe essentially unloads his frustration about not really benefiting from the Eminem co-sign that Slaughterhouse got in the early 2010s. The song was done in a respectable way, not directly criticizing Eminem for Slaughterhouse’s lack of mainstream success, but asking for guidance in an industry that is largely unrecognizable from the era when Eminem dropped “My Name Is.” After hearing that song, I felt that if I could be respectful about it, I could vent my own frustration on wax. The point I wanted to get across was – if Eminem were to become what the cynics say he is, will future generations even care to study his influence?
Writing & Production
I “produced” the beat – again “produced” in quotes because mixing and matching loops feels inauthentic. However, since it is a direct sequel and I “produced” the first, it only felt right to make this one the same way, going heavy on keys, and ending with only said keys playing. The verses in this song are uneven in length – the first and second are 24 bars while the third is only 20. I did not do very many takes when recording the vocals. Since it’s one of the more personal songs on the album, the emotion came out of me very naturally.
Callbacks to Alternate Ending
As I mentioned, this song is a direct sequel to “Before I’m Torn Apart.” I wanted to make that very clear from the beginning – so the intro lines are an interpolation of the hook from that song.
Before I’m Torn Apart chorus:I watched you fade away // It breaks my blackened heart // Let’s go back to the start // Before I’m torn apart
Old You Back intro:You fade away // As I fell apart // From yet another broken heart // Now it’s too late to restart
One fundamental difference between the two songs is the people I address. Only one one of the people – the friend, who was the subject of the second verse in Before I’m Torn Apart – is also discussed in Old You Back. For this reason I made it the first verse. The first line of the song is exactly the same “It’s harder than you might think to summon the spirit.” Then the song consciously acknowledges it’s going to go in a different direction. Instead of “to gain the courage I needed to write these lyrics,” the second line is “but I don’t need courage any more, too apathetic to fear shit.” I also altered another lyric from the original:
Before I’m Torn Apart lyric: “Don’t want nobody, not even your chick friends to know what a back-stabbing prick you’ve been”
Old You Back lyric: “I said I wouldn’t mention your chick friends but they made your head sick, then you let this end”
Rawhide Report
I like how you constructed this song. Your verses and the order in which you’ve arranged them seems intentionally well thought out. I also appreciate how the content of each of the verses is extremely personal, but I’d like to especially commend you on that second verse. Although your second verse is the most accessible and relatable of the three, in terms of connecting with the audience, you still manage to make it extremely personal when you talk about how formative and influential Eminem’s first albums were in terms of your own rap career and your life in general; therefore tying everything all back together to the concept. I like how the final piano chord of this beat actually plays right into the beginning of [REDACTED]. Also shout-out for using the kitty voice in the third verse.
This week’s release from the In/Stability album will feature The Rawhide Kid. To set the right vibes, Rawhide put together some behind-the-scenes footage from the “Xan4merz” music video. Watch below, and listen to the new track “I Suck” when it drops Friday at midnight.